No matter how much you’ve internalized the concept of self-love, you probably still have inner naysayer nagging at you. That inner voice that is constantly giving us messages is there for nearly everyone. Your inner naysayer can often be quite a pest, telling you all sorts of negative things that hurt your self-esteem and make you second-guess yourself. But sometimes that voice can be useful. Let’s take a look at when you should listen to your inner naysayer and when you should ignore it.

About Your Inner Naysayer

Your inner naysayer can be due to a lot of different things. Regardless of its purpose, it’s your inner voice that is trying to tell you something or to guide you. The name “naysayer” implies negativity. Therefore, the things this voice has to say are usually negative in nature. Each person’s inner naysayer is unique. The messages they give are based upon your own individual life experience and personality. Your inner naysayer is trying to protect you, in most cases, even if that protection ends up hindering you or limiting you in some way.

When to Listen

Sometimes you should take heed when you hear your inner naysayer giving you a message. In order to know whether the message is helpful or not, it’s important to take time to dissect it. Ask yourself some questions. Is it realistic? Is it helpful? Is it true? If the answer to these questions is yes, you should listen. For example, you may want to go on a date with someone new, but your keep having nagging thoughts telling you to stay home. Sit quietly and think about the reasons your inner voice is telling you not to go out with this person. If you see red flags or feel this person isn’t being truthful, listen to your gut. It’s there to protect you physically and emotionally.

When Not to Listen

Often times, we let negative messages others have given us about ourselves stick with us through life. We may internalize them as our own and adopt them as self-defeating beliefs. Let’s explore the above date scenario further. Your inner naysayer is telling you not to go out with your potential date. Why is it saying that? If it’s because you’re not attractive enough or smart enough for them, that’s likely insecurity talking. Go on the date and give it a shot. Don’t let your insecurities win out.

Your inner naysayer is usually there to protect you. Perhaps it’s acting as a defense mechanism and repeating insecurities you’ve internalized about yourself. Maybe it’s a warning from your gut reminding you to heed red flags. Take time to listen to your inner naysayer before deciding how to act. You’ll know whether to listen or not.

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